Edit: any “European” troops should get some of their friends and, basically other people of Europe so we can make a European division.
Welcome, Global Defenders, to a whole new army. It has come to my attention that this very proud, young army needs some tuning up. So, it would seem I am back. and this post is going to be pretty important, so you better read it.
At this point in time, our leader Pungy has informed me that the Defenders have become to unorganized, uncaring and unmanageable, to a point where he honestly believes killing the army is the best option. If Pungy has come to this conclusion, our founder who has not accepted defeat even when it looked him in the face, who effectively restarted GD many times at its dead points without officially declaring a new generation, if he truly believes it is time to click “delete site” and move on, well, than things are bad. There IS NO argument.
So, I have come and reinstated myself as Leader of the Global Defenders alongside Pungy once more. As a previous leader, I full authority to do this as long as the Senate or Owner’s Council does not object. And looking at both, I don’t see a chance of them even meeting. So here is a VERY IMPORTANT list of reforms.
Ranks No More
I hereby completely wipe out ALL RANKS, both members, moderators, and owners, with the exception of Pungy and myself. To regain your rank, you simply must comment by Friday. Slim, I’m sure you will comment and you will receive leader again, but if you don’t then you really aren’t active enough anyway. NO EXCEPTIONS (Except That Which Has Already Been Excepted).
Uniform Etc. Shipments
From now until the end of time, once a month we will ship in uniforms, accessories and apparel from Outback. Unfortunately, though we no longer retain Outback, that is where all our uniform factories existed. This means Pungy and I have to pay heavy taxes on imports, but its worth it. No troop is required to purchase a new uniform, though that old helmet of yours is so old it has a hole where Alaska is. Money for purchase will be provided by the Bank of Pungy.
Senate Removal Act
I hereby give Shadowstar by Friday to schedule a full Senate Meeting. The meeting must be scheduled for before the following Friday (May 25). If this meeting is not scheduled or fails to meet with 70% of the Senate’s members, the Senate will be REMOVED. In its place will be monthly Assembly meetings where all members may share their grievances or ideas to be voted on by all attending.
Cookie Eating Act
All troops are required, by Global Defender Law, to eat one cookie a day. Jaffa cakes do not count. NO EXCEPTIONS. Punishable by DEATH.
Promotion Requirements Act
Promotions will no longer be treated the same. Promotions will be decided individually by the Leader(s) for troops who they believe show appropriate activity. “Activity” means attending at least 70% of a month’s EVENTS, whether a Battle, Practice Battle, Recruiting Session or Training, with reasonable excuses for any absence. This is where the Leader’s “appropriate activity” determinations comes in. Also, as a minimum, all troops MUST recruit ONE NEW TROOP every month. If a troop fails to gain one recruit, they cannot be promoted. Owners are the only exception. Promotions will be posted by the first of each month.
The Stamp Act
This act declares all paper products imported in the British American Colonies be taxed and stamped. This includes parchment, magazines, newspapers, playing cards, etc. Taxes must be paid in British currency to the British colonial governors.
Owner-Mod Training Act
This is simply the further development and continuation of the previous Ownership training requirement. Now two separate training programs will be run, one for Mods and one for Members. Any member rank hoping to become a Moderator must complete the simple, basic leadership training program (Mod-Training). Any mod rank hoping to become an Owner must complete the more skillful, leadership-oriented training program (Owner-Training). Exceptions will be made by the Leader(s) based on prior experience in other armies.
Bigger Than The Tanzimat Act
This act states that the Global Defender reform must be larger than the Tanzimat. The Tanzimat (meaning “reorganization”) was a reform program during the Ottoman Empire initiated by Mahmud II. Our reform must be larger than that. (Wikipedia may be helpful).
Signed into Law,
Filed under: Global Defenders