In GD Chat, December 17, 2012.
The unanimous Declaration of the Soviet Server of Outback,
When in the Course of penguin events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the game, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s Pear entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of penguinkind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all penguins are created equal, that they are endowed by the Holy Pear with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Ownership.–That to secure these rights, Armies are instituted among Penguins, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of CP Army becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the Penguins to alter or to abolish it, and to institute a new Army, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Reason, indeed, will dictate that Armies long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that penguinkind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such an Army, and to provide new Guards for their future security.–Such has been the patient sufferance of this Server; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former CP Army Government. The history of the present “President” of the Global Defenders, Pungy Agrippa, is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over this Server. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
He has refused to organize or make clear events designed to keep the Army alive, instead delaying these alerts for his own convenience.
He has unfairly and biasedly given and taken positions in the Army based on friendship and maintenance of his own power rather than give them to those who have earned the ranks.
He has kept an administration of lazy and uncaring individuals with no potential in the army, refusing to remove these people and creating a dangerous tyranny of his own rule unchallenged.
He has given positions of great importance in the Meeting Place known as Chat to foreigners and those uninterested in the welfare in the Army, withholding these positions from loyal and active soldiers.
He has allowed the places of meeting and importance such as Chat to deteriorate into a social gathering place, even in times of great urgency and war, and failed to gain control of this.
He has not called together the legislative body, the Assembly, when the Speaker of the Assembly has failed to do so and has made no emphasis of the importance of the Democratic Process, for the sole purpose of having compliance with his measures.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing to formally assign and make active the Supreme Court, and the judges unofficially chosen are loyal to him and him alone.
He has allowed the Lords of Servers to become self-interested and opposed to any benefit in the Army, and has not enforced their administration as originally intended, instead observing a faulty governing element fail to work properly.
He has failed to enforce the Lordship Reform Act, allowing Lords with few or no troops loyal to them to keep positions of Power when the law specifically forbids Lordships of such insignificant sizes.
He has negotiated Peace when Peace is all but proper, and refused wars with Armies demanded by the People, instead issuing declarations of War on Armies of no consequence to this Army, keeping us frail and weak, and altogether insignificant in the CP Army World.
He has made Peace with SWAT, an army completely inferior to ours, and given away half our capital to these Savages, abandoning many of our People to a society of chaos and anarchy.
He has failed to meet agreements with SWAT to defend the small claims we have since had to Outback, allowing the Server to be overrun with Foreigners and doing nothing to assert our Control over the Server.
He has allowed himself to become busy with Foreign and International affairs not concerning us, especially the failed United Nations and with the Press, making himself strong but ignoring this Army and keeping us weak, a mere trophy of his “Success.”
He has endeavored in costly scientific programs, allowing dangerous experimentation in studies not fully understood and dangerous to the People as a whole.
He has allowed these very experiments to escape the Army’s control, and made no response, oral or physical, to the infestation of a Parallel Universe that has resulted from these experiments.
He has neglected to enforce the training of new soldiers coming into the Army through the Academy, making the Army weak and in the hands of inexperienced, untrained cadets.
He has falsely accused individuals of crimes against the Army when they did not exist, denying the Supreme Court trial over the individuals, and instead taking matters into his own hands with little evidence of such crimes committed.
He has done all in his ability to keep himself in Power, acting as a Tyrant over this Army for nearly two years in a world where most reign no more than half that time.
We, therefore, the Representatives of the Server of Outback, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of this Server, solemnly publish and declare, That this Server is, and of Right ought to be a Free and Independent Army; that it is Absolved from all Allegiance to the Global Defenders, and that all political connection between it and the Army, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as a Free and Independent Army, it has full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Armies may of right do.
If the Army has any objection to our secession, we demand concession to our grievances, that this Army may become a Free Army, unoppressed by tyrants ensconced and hidden under claims to Democracy. We demand as concession that we gain control over this Army so we may guide and guard it in its future days, allowing it growth and success unseen under such despots. We also demand the tyrant himself, Pungy Agrippa, step down from his lofty throne and join the Common Penguin unpunished, so true Communist Democracy may for once work as intended in Club Penguin. If these concessions are not met, we claim our rightful Independence and Secession, and declare the birth of a new Free and Equal Army, the Outback Soviet. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of the Holy Pear, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Ranks and our sacred Honor.
TL;DR: We declare Outback an independent army because we think Pungy is doing a poo poo head job at leading.
Filed under: Global Defenders